Rocky Horror show Remake

Every since my sister had found it cheap enough on Ebay and brought it i have being watching rocky horror every day, some people may say 'your obsessed' but my reply is 'what the bajuice! its a good film'.

so many good great films are getting remake today, Italian job*, The Producers, Charlie And The Chocolate Factory**, that i came to think of my very own remake of Rocky Horror, and who i would cast to play each pure original character. most if not all are British as im a Snob, and there isnt enough British Actors being given good roles.

Dr. Frank-N-Furter would be played by Stephen Mangan, i think he could pull off a crazed transvestite very nicely, also he is half way there with the hair so i wouldnt have to wait for it to grow.

Brad Majors would be played by Christian Bale as ive always wanted to know what he would look like in glasses, and he doesn't want to just stick to playing serious characters all his life he'll get a name for himself.

Janet Weiss would be played by Raquel Cassidy, as ive always love her acting ever since i first saw her in Teachers, and in my mind anyone is better then susan sarandon as im just not a fan of her.

Riff Raff would be played by Malcolm Mcdowell but the clockwork orange days (what?! i never said they were from the here and now, it can be anyone from any period in history) plus you need a very good actor to replace Richard O'Brien, crystal maze is all im saying.

Magenta would be played by Kelly Macdonald, now i know i know this is one of those 'far out there' picks, i know she would never be as good as Patricia Quinn, no one ever is as good as their original but i would love to see Macdonald as a crazy freaky woman i think she could do it, and like i said before you don't want to just play serious roles, im sure they get boring after a while.

Rocky would be played by Hans Matheson as Rocky is suppose to be handsome and young and Hans Matheson is very handsome and young.

the Narrator would be played by Richard Attenborough, i would love to see this man doing the 'Timewarp' dance, plus he has an excellent voice and thats what you need to be a Narrator, you don't want some 'bad-ass boy' doing it you wouldn't understand him, but really just seeing him do the 'timewarp' dance would make me very happy.

Columbia would be played by Shirley Henderson, because if i was ever a film director i would always have her in my films. i think she's fantastic, also Nell Campbell used a high voice and as we all know Shirley Henderson has one too.

you cant beat meatloaf, he has coolness puring out of him uncontrollably. so i wouldnt replace him, and anyway it always bumps up peoples interest if the film has an orignal member.

This was way harder then i thought it would be. Remember this is just for fun, if i EVER read anywhere that they are remaking it and casting rubbish actors who can barely pull of dramatic moment im going to start shooting arrows***

*even though the Americans messed that up by NOT basing the majority of the film in Italy, there is a hint in the name. and a member being killed by another member? i don't remember that happening. and everyone in it to steal the gold for themselves double crossing the rest of the group, i think not! stick to the original you get to listen to 'Quincy Jones - gotta bloomin' move on' song.

** Tim Burton, great with visual affects cant beat him, but he has never been all that good when it comes to the scripts.

*** Guns are too violent and way too much blood is spilt. You see, killing by crossbow is much more stylish, i for one, if i was being killed in some mass murder would choose the later.